Every year when Apr. 1 rolls around, everyone in the gaming community braces themselves for the April Fools Day media blitz filled with poorly constructed jokes and overly sensationalized lies. Journalists have to turn off every instinct they have to cover stories, as untruths that try to capture web traffic by disguising themselves as “funny”, without ever actually saying or doing anything that is humorous, drown the internet.
Five years ago, people may have been into the Googly eyes in Overwatch, or the fake news pieces from tech companies announcing some impossible product, but as time has gone on, the jokes have become increasingly homogenous, predictable, and intolerable.
To save you the trouble and brain cells, here’s what’s “out there” in the world of April Fools, without even looking.
#1 Something about RGB
You have seen RGB gaming products, from headsets to mice, but have you seen our latest RGB product: RGB nail polish!
This RGB nail polish can be customized to show 15 quadrillion different colors using our RGB software. Check out this ad that we spent way too much money producing, which uses very transparent CGI coloring techniques to fake RGB effects on this person's fingernails! Wow!
#2 Company launches dumb but “funny” product
Here’s our new exclusive Doublelift-signed keyboard: Worlds Playoffs Limited Edition. “F” key missing.
#3 Patch Notes that aren’t real
We just released a new patch for the game, not on patch day! We removed all tanks from the game and replaced them with a brand new chicken character that has 10,000 health but can’t do any damage!
#4 Legendary player decides to quit long time team/esport
Can you believe it? [Famous player] is leaving their old team! They have been such a cornerstone to their wildly successful org in their chosen esport, but now they are leaving to go pro in Fall Guys! This is incredible and believable news!
#5 Team drops their entire roster
Although we saw actual teams dropping their rosters earlier this week, it is with a heavy heart that we announce that we have cut all of our [esports] team. We wish them luck in their future endea.... JK we didn’t drop them! APRIL FOOOOOLS!
#6 Team expands into silly game that’s never gonna be an esport
FaZe Clan is expanding into professional eknitting! Eknitting competitions are the growing craze in VR esports, and now that FaZe Clan has signed a bunch of professional knitting talent, the eknitting scene is on track to grow faster than ever!
Join us in welcoming our newest players Henry “Yarn” Jones, Catherine “StitchIt” McPhearson, and Cynthia “friends don’t let friends knit while drunk” Johnson!
#7 Game delayed
A game that the company already promised investors and fans will release in 2021 is now delayed until 2025! That’s right, you will have to wait an extra four years before playing that game you wanted to play! This joke is totally funny, and doesn’t strike too close to home for those waiting on Diablo 4, Overwatch 2, and a plethora of other perpetually delayed titles.
#8 Something about the LCS being a competitive region in League of Legends
That’s the April Fools Day whole joke.
#9 Half-Life 3 officially announced
Aaron is an esports reporter with a background in media, technology, and communication education.